Book Review: The Formative Five

I received a book recommendation from our Guidance Counselor the other day. She recommended Dr. Michelle Borba’s Unselfie, a book that hopes to bring back empathy in our lives, in general, and in the lives of our children, in particular. Checking the book’s bibliograohic data and reviews online, I put in our possible purchase file. My staff is processing budget and costing as I write this.

So, while waiting for the acquisition of Borba’s book, Unselfie, I searched for books in our collection that discuss empathy. I found one that looked like a good match to our GC’s information need. 

I semt her my review and recommendation. Sharing with you, my dear readers, what I sent her.

Dear GC, here’s a book you may wish to browse or read: The Formative Five Fostering Grit, Empathy and other Success Skills Every Student Needs by Thomas R. Hoerr (2017). Chapter two is where Empathy is, how to grow and nurture it in the school, strategies for teachers to help students develop empathy, why listening is the at the core of empathy, tips for school leaders in support of teachers who build empathy in and out of the classroom. Integrity, self-control and diversity are the three success skills identified and discussed further in the book. Includes a self-assessment of the five success skills. 

The  book ends with an emphasis on culture as key in actualizing the formative five. Hoerr uses John Coleman’s 6 Components of Culture (Harvard, 2013) as gauge or indicators of success. These are Mission, Values, Practices, People, Narrative and Place. Hoerr takes on his administrator’s har in this chapter, but ends the book with a very humanist turn by drumming up the importance of relationships and what makes us happy being teachers and working with children and young people.

Our library OPAC is down, but you can always send an email for questions and sources. 

I am a Human Book!

When an old man dies, a library burns to the ground. ~ African Proverb

I made another visit to our neighbour, the De La Salle University Science and Technology Centre (DLSU STC) Canlubang. I was there as an invited guest in the Human Library project. I was one of their Human Books.

The DLSU STC community conducts the Human Library every year with the objective of opening avenues to understand people who come from different backgrounds, experiences, social status and circumstances in life. It prompts participants to listen to Human Books and create opportunities to dialogue with them. This way, stereotypes and prejudices are challenged. In previous years, invited Human Books included a politician, a peace advocate, a Chinese immigrant to the Philippines, a naturalised Indian Filipino, the university's security guard, a sar-sari store vendor, a single parent, a cop with a disability.

With Candy May Schif and Willian San Andres Frias

I was there to tell stories about being a librarian, a blogger and author as well. I had two sessions each with high school students (grade 7-9) and senior high school students (grade 10-12). The younger group was eager to ask questions about books and reading, that my work as librarian is perceived as boring by others, what career opportunities await a library and information science graduate and if I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). I don't know where that question came from, but it was probably the design and layout of my presentation slide. I was also very conscious of the time allotment. The older group was more interested in knowing my life as an author and the back stories of each of my published books. Both group of students were interested at knowing life outside the classroom and the grown ups who populate the community they belong to. I honestly answered all their questions with all honesty especially the one with the OCD issue.

I had fun interacting with students. In a way, I also learned from them. Young people are curious. Young people have a lot to say. I think we need to listen to them too.

During the lunch at the common room, I had a good time chatting and knowing the Human Books who were guests like me. I met Susan Quimpo, who was my art therapist two summers ago. I met friends from the DLSU Library System. It was like attending a reunion!

The librarians of the DLSU STC really did a good job putting this together. And, I have to say this, the teaching and non-academic staff gave their all out support. The Human Library is one program that helps develop empathy among people, young and old alike.

A Year After My Stroke of Luck

Finding inner peace can be a struggle.

When I was a still a school librarian in Xavier School, a classroom teacher became one of my assistants. She came from a long leave of absence after a minor stroke that rendered her insecure and fearful. While she tried her best to work alongside the healthier staff of the library, her moods and temperament swung from left to right. She couldn’t keep up with the entire demands and energy of the preschool community thus, the work assigned to her were few and light. Hoping this would give her the time and the pace to recoup, gather up her strength and go back to full time teaching for the next school year, she wallowed in self pity. It affected her work output and productivity. She became a burden to many on days when she was down.

It had not been easy for all of us, most especially for me as I was the librarian-in-charge of that library located in the early childhood education unit of the school. One day, she told me of her desire to go back to classroom teaching because, she utterly felt useless in the library. She believed she was meant to teach. Her health has stabilised somewhat according to her doctor. To go back in the classroom would renew her self confidence and vigor.

Who was I to prevent her? The next school year, she was moved back to the Grade School department to the relief of the staff and the teachers who endured her for one academic year.

I remember her now because today is the first year anniversary of my Transient Ischemic Attack (TIA). How easy it had been for me to dismiss faith and belief to someone who survived a stroke. Indeed, putting one’s self in the shoes of another is very different from experiencing a life changing event. The emotional and psychological recovery takes time. I remember her now with the realization of how fragile our bodies are, more so, our feelings and state of mind.

Now I know how it is to be insecure and afraid. To lie in bed, begging for sleep to come but worry hovers and keeps me awake for hours; to cling and to seek friends who would patiently listen to my complaints. The irrepressible Zarah Gagatiga is no more but a vulnerable woman afraid to die at any moment. There are days when, after a productive day at work, fear would gnaw at my insides and it would leave me exhausted until either of my kids or my husband assures and pacifies me. Telling me and reminding me of my worth. That I am loved. That I am not alone. I doubted myself a lot since the stroke. My prayer to God had been a litany of endurance and survival. Nahihiya na nga na ako sa Dios because, there are instances when I have become blind to the graces, the mercy and the blessings that came my way since the TIA.

At Nuvali on Easter, 2017

Yet, God’s love is stronger than my fears. Walang hangan ang kanyang pasensya. Walang katapusan ang kanyang pagmamahal.

Everyday, He continues to give me the grace to see the kindness in people and to bask in the glory and the goodness of His creation.

Despite myself, I pray for humility and a forgiving heart.

I wish I had been kinder to that former colleague of mine. No one knows if I will see her again. But, I resolve to live life one day at a time; to be simply grateful for every breath and for every waking moment; to be kind and to do goodness for as long as I live.