I realized I could never leave home without my keys and my maintenance medications. My wallet is a given. It does not count. But my maintenance meds and the keys to the house, the backdoor gate, the rooms, drawers and cabinets propels me into stress should I forget to bring them with me. My internal sunshine fades into shadow. I spiral down to a stress eating habit the entire day despite practical solutions applied in cases like this.
The stress eating could go on for days. It is a by product of trauma and adverse experiences from years past. I shall write about this when I am ready. For now, let me dwell on the importance of always bringing along my jumble of keys and medications every day.
What is it with keys and medicines?
Keys open things. Keys present opportunities. Keys can be duplicated, given and entrusted to the next person of kin or close relationships. Keys allow me to open locked doors to the house; to escape to a room and seek comfort; to rest undisturbed in my own room; or just to simply stay in the safety of home.
What can be found next to my jumble of keys inside my bag is my pouch of medicines. Mostly maintenance meds: lipitor, clopidogrel, antihistamine plus, vitamins and supplements like collagen and zinc. I also bring with me two packets of hydrate and erceflora. Yes. These are my sources of sustenance, comfort and peace of mind. If keys provide me with a sense of freedom of choice and a bit of control, my medicines, vitamins and supplements calms me down. Its presence in my bag, kept in a soft, canvas pouch is a reminder of the fragility of life and the big responsibility of valuing life as well.
Keys and medicines reassure me that there are solutions to problems and that, the first person who must take care of me is myself. I need to remember what such precious little things can do and magnify. My life has come to this.
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