I was with Ouie the day before he died. We had dinner at the 60s Diner in SM Sta. Rosa. We talked about a lot of things from the mundane to the profound: how to pronounce “Randy” when we are in a good mood or otherwise to the calm and quiet demeanor of T. Vic. His mere presence would make him feel safe. Randy is the name I gave his BMW, btw. We had a good meal. Nabusog kami sa bulalo, chicken tenders, salad, mojos and rice. Of course. We had a good time.
When he brought me home, my daughter, Zoe, immediately got dressed to catch her former VA teacher for a hello-goodbye-take care greeting. She makes it a point to do this every time Ouie drops me off at our place. And when she visits BA, she would run to him with a blazing smile on her face. That Saturday night, the last time Ouie brought me safely home, she held the same radiance as always. I was in awe at the sparkle in my daughter’s eyes waving goodbye at Ouie. I never failed to thank him for giving my stoic, Nietzsche-esque daughter reason to shine and shimmer.
Ouie is very good at it. He knows how to bring out the charisma, energy and effervescent qualities hidden or long forgotten in people whom he loves and cares for. He even manages to see the unique strengths and abilities of people he finds difficult to deal with. It doesn’t mean that he is a pushover or dismissive of the frailties and flaws of human nature. He recognizes and acknowledges them. At the end of the day, he chooses to be proactive and constructive.
Hindi ko naman pinagtatakhan kung saan niya nakuha at natutunan ang ganitong katangian. Matagal na kaming magkakilala ni Ouie, pero sa BA kami naging close na parang magkapatid. Noong ibinahagi ni Ouie sa akin ang sanaysay na sinulat niya para sa kanyang pumanaw ng ina, nasabi ko na lang sa sarili ko, ah! kaya naman pala maaruga si Ouie sa mga tao at hayop na mahal niya at malapit sa kanyang puso.
Mayroong isang talata sa sanaysay na gustong gusto ko dahil nakita ko si Ouie sa ikinuwento niyang gawain ng kanyang ina. Babasahin ko ang talata na hango sa kanyang sanaysay na may pamagat na “The Light in the Kitchen”
“In the silent hours of the morning, she flicks on the light switches to light her way as she moves from her bedroom, down the stairs, to the dining area and finally to the kitchen. From the open door of my bedroom, I would wake up and see the light cast from the kitchen. I breathe in deeply and say, “Oh, fried chicken!” or “tortang talong” or whatever would be my packed lunch at school”.
Ouie loves to cook. Ouie loves to eat. Ouie can flick on the light switches for himself so he can find his way in the dark - with a bit of a struggle in recent times because he has been grappling with entropy physically and metaphorically; best of all, he turns on light switches for others to find their own way and eventually, they glimmer and glow.
To see the goodness in people. To seek beauty in adversity. To create something useful or noble from all of these life experiences is art. ART as a pathway to goodness. The formation of goodness is through the ARTS. Virtus et Ars. Virtue in the Arts.
When I told him I want to draw using charcoal and graphite, he taught me warm ups and sketching exercises. Then he wrote on my sketch book, explore your lights and your darks. In October, a few days before that fateful Sunday, I showed him my drawings of a plant and some foliage. He said, it’s time to learn about space— the positive and the negative. He made me a view finder and demonstrated how to use it. I didn’t know then that it was our final art lesson.
I learned many things from Ouie about art and living creatively. At the end of every work week, he would remind me to never forget to go on an artist’s date with myself. It is self care. It kept me sane and happy. His mentoring gave me the confidence to draw, to paint and to make clay pots again. He inspired me to take courage in navigating the uncertain landscapes of midlife on my own but with the knowledge that I am never alone.
This is how I will remember Ouie. Lamp lighter; Star polisher; A lighthouse. A beacon of light that is beaming and shinning for ships at sea that they may push on to greater adventures and unto the completion of journeys and that, in the end, they will always find their way safely back home.
There is an exhibit of his art at the gallery. As you visit and view his works, please remember how Ouie made you smile and laugh. How did he motivate you to pick yourself up from a fall? What did he say or do that inspired you to risk or to take that extra mile and discover a talent, an inner strength or the simple ability to laugh at oneself over a silly mistake? What was the best moment you had in his class that you can carry with you when you leave the Academy? I do hope that when you have thought about it, it will move you to do acts of kindness, in big and small ways, or to work on something good, true and beautiful.
Go Griffins!
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